ii.
Or, say, hearts–
also formed from
compression,
an inward pull,
from longing.
In the stellate
dogwood
a flickering thing,
a hummingbird
filling angles
of fog-white air
with desperate
wing spreads,
hardly effortless
to beat, contract,
to stay aloft,
alive, to not be
dwarfed by
the growing
winter.
I liked this one… I’m not really sure why, but something about it agreed with me. The flow was really good and the rhyming was as well. I really enjoyed this one. :]
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I think being mysteriously agreeable is a high compliment for a poem, thanks for your kind comment!
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I really like this. But the ghost of my friend Archie keeps mumbling the words of the poem in his soft NC accent as I’m trying to re-read it and making comments to me about it, so I keep losing my train of thought. Yes Archie, I know you love “a flickering thing” all alone like that on its own line, and you love the sense of continuance in the first line “Or, say, hearts–” with someone actually using a comma in poem in a way that works, I agree, I do. C, you will have to record yourself reading this sequence before all I can hear is a ticklish ghost’s voice who is too pleased with each line to read them in order. ..On to 28.3!…
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Does the ghost of your friend Archie do readings? So funny you should mention it, I was just thinking this morning about how much I loathe reading my own poems at things, not out of stage fright or disliking how they sound aloud, but just not liking my boringly-accented voice. I guess that’s why wine is usually provided ? 🙂
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Right! And the thing to do is drink wine BEFORE the reading.
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Hello, I check your new stuff like every week. Your writing style is awesome,
keep doing what you’re doing!
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thanks so much!
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